Not every high-moment, however long it is sustained - is going to seem worth it indefinitely. There's always a risk of Unpredictable phases that follow the Great Feelings.
Yesterday & Today; the days immediately following a 2-Day binge of Adderal, Nicotine & Amisulpride, that is...today & Yesterday being an abrupt stopping of those Meds...I felt an unrelenting Wave of Depression, Gloom & Rumination. An Anxiety, mixed with Anhedonia...even some vicious Agitation.
...A bit ironic; feeling so Tired & Lethargic, as If my Brain is Asleep and Awake at the same time...that I would yet experience a Fierce anger towards little things, from those around me...even Family Members.
But I should consciously recognize this...these patterns. Because I wrote about them. I explained them!
A tired brain is...quite oftenly an Irritable Brain...irrespective of Age.
Yet...in my astoundingly low Moment, I decided to write this post...in sort of a Stale mood - yet interestingly maintaining the Clarity & Focus needed to Write this.
But Weakened/Damaged people aren't necessarily INCAPACITATED...they are, without a doubt...many times the most Observant & Self-Aware people. Sometimes self-awareness is a Gift that Leads to spontaneous Resilience, and sometimes in that Awareness, it is possible to break through the Fog of Darkness & hopelessness, that encompasses a Withdrawing, Depressed mind. But I am Lucky to be Gifted with such a Mind, however DULL the Moment is now, can NOT stop my Stride to Success & Glory. Let this message Permeate. Resonate. Because I write now and always, no Death awaits me even in unkind Rumination...not even in Suspicion. Or in any *negative emotion*. Those are temporary. Temporary enough that I know my Next Leap now is a NECESSITY...and preventing further slumps a Crucial Endeavor. One that may - give me the Success of The Ages.
UPDATE: Day 3: Withdrawal from Adderal + Nicotine Binge: Along with Green Tea/Caffeine softgels I also
Took 500 MG Muira Puama extract to help lift Brain Fog/listnessness...this seemed to help quite a bit but it took about an Hour and a Half - to kick in.
It seems to provide Energy & Clarity...and revived My Mood by early evening (about 4 hours later?).
Many might ask why choose THAT herb as a go-pill today...the answer is because it was one of the better herbs I have and I'd rather not tap into my Phenyl Piracetam stash again...and have to withdraw from a 4th Substance.
So MP seems like a more sensible idea.
I intend to take another Muira Puama capsule around 6PM. Along with my standard Green Tea/Caffeine softgels I dosed earlier today as Well!
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